I plan to address all of those questions today.
Firstly, I’d like to announce that we are officially back for 2014. Secondly, I’ve always been a believer that you have to give the people what they want and there was always a place for my blog. After all it’s still the highest rating feature ever to appear on NMFC.com.au and eclipses ‘Buried Treasure’. Finally, I was always against its hiatus and have been campaigning for its return. Unfortunately I was forced to play the ‘Captain’ card to secure the deal.
The reason it was parked for the best part of 12-months is a mystery to me. I don’t want to name names, but if you directed your ire at the North media department and in particular Rob ‘the dog’ Burton, you wouldn’t be too far off.
But that’s enough about that; the important thing is that I’m back and I have a lot of dirt to shovel around.
Mmmm…where to start?
A lot has happened since my last blog. Buddy has gone to Sydney, which was news to my wife Elise until last week. Remarkably she had no idea about the trade and now says it’s up to me to keep her informed with everything.
Well perhaps one of the biggest off field issues for North is Ryan Bastinac’s hair. He’s so unsure about what to do with it. He used to keep it pretty short but now he’s growing it out and apparently really likes the Samurai bun look adopted by Michael Hurley at Essendon and Brodie Grundy at Collingwood. He reckons he’s only about month away from being able to tie it up on the top of his head like them and has also considered using a headband to keep it out of his eyes.
It’s made me wonder what he’d look like if he did follow through and left it another month. This is what I’ve come up with.
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Given these shocking examples, what should Basty really do with his hair? Vote below to give him an idea.
It’s a good thing he’s not Sam Gibson I suppose because Gibbo cuts his own hair I’m told.
Basty’s hair is about as concerning as the fracture of the Pirates. It has come to my attention that the famed group (originally Atts, JMac and Ben ‘Sawn’ Mabon) is in danger of disbanding completely. It all started when Sawny was delisted and moved interstate making the trio a duo, and now J-Mac is out of the side with an injury meaning Atts has to find a new room-mate. On the bus from the Sydney Airport to the hotel, Atts was heard telling Benny Jacobs, ‘If I play well tomorrow, J-Mac can find a new room-mate when he gets back in because I won’t go back with him.’ The ramifications of that are pretty significant. There’s no loyalty anymore it seems.
Speaking of which, we received some sad news this week – our video guy Tom Vanden-Hoogenband has taken a job at Essendon. The boys took it pretty well though as you can see by this photo Shaun Atley sent me.
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He’ll be leaving us after Round 7 and I’ll be there to tell him to get on his bike.
There a plenty of cyclists around Arden Street but one almost bit the dust a few weeks ago when Channel 7 news came to door-stop the boys after the loss to the Bombers. Reporter Tom Browne got out of his car to chase Boomer and door-stopped a bike rider instead. His door swung into the guy’s path and he flew 10 feet over the handle bars but miraculously got up and rode off. Tom was a bit shocked and to make his morning worse, he missed out on questioning Boomer.
It’s good to have some dirt on the journos for a change. While I’m at it, Channel 9 news reporter Clint Stanaway was down last week for Harvey’s Heroes and refused to go outside because it was raining. He asked that the players he’d requested to interview be brought to him indoors.
Talking about the media; ‘The Pig’ Levi Greenwood has attracted plenty of media interest due to his great form since getting back in the team. It’s great to have him on interstate trips like this because he provides some gold. In the recreation room at the hotel, he was playing table tennis with Spud and kept hitting the ball into the net. He thought something was wrong with the table and asked, “Is the net higher on my side?”
It’s one of the dumbest things I’ve heard. Even dumber than the time Rob Burton tried to stick paper to a plaster wall with a magnet. Or the time Rob’s wife super glued her pants to her leg. Or the time Majak Daw confused Craig Hutchison with Kevin Sheehan during TAC Cup Future Stars and called him ‘Shifter’ live on air. Or the time our physio Shane O’Sullivan tried to swipe his fingers across his laptop screen because he thought it was an iPad but then covered it up by saying he was wiping ‘fluff’ off it.
He’s not the only physio to be a little red faced of late. We had a new physio at the club and he grabbed a ball during training and went to handball it to me, but his thumb got stuck in his pocket and he ended up ripping his pants all the way down to his thigh. He didn’t want anyone to see his undies and bolted for the change rooms.
Anyway, I can’t give you all my goss in one go and have to keep my powder dry for the next trip.
I hope you’ve enjoyed the return of Follow Swallow, don’t forget to vote on Basty’s hair.
