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I’m lonely. A part of me is missing. I need to fill this void. I have officially run out of episodes of the West Wing. I am beside myself and am having withdrawals from President Bartlett, Josh Lyman, Sam Seaborn and Donna Moss.

After seven long seasons, more than 150 episodes and over 100 hours, it has all come to an end. I need a replacement television series and am taking recommendations.

One person I won’t be listening to is Jack Ziebell after I just found out that he is addicted to Home and Away. He says he ‘can’t stop watching it’. We arrived in Perth today and when it hit 5pm local time, Jack said “Home and Away will be on in Melbourne right now.” Sadly, I think he has influenced Sam Wright and Ben Warren who are allegedly watching it too.

On the way over on the Qantas flight I ordered Ginger beer - it was the best decision I have ever made. I encourage everyone to consume more ginger beer. Ginger beer is severely underrated. I am biased though because I have two to three packets of ginger nut biscuits a week and I am making no reference to our resident ginger nut Drew Petrie.

But, while we are speaking of the vice-captain, I reckon it’s time he came out and accepted his ginger nut roots. Drew has always been in denial about his red hair and should take a leaf out of the books of Leigh Adams, Cameron Ling, Todd Banfield, Gary Rohan, Ron Weasley from Harry Potter, Nicole Kidman, Julia Gillard, Lucille Ball, Ron Howard, that red-haired kid on the Gold Coast and Josh Thurgood.

There’s a fair bit of red in Lachie Hansen’s beard actually and he was a little red faced this week when he received his first iPhone bill. We all know that he was the last player to get an iPhone but it seems no one warned him about the costs of internet downloads. Apparently he is without a plan and nearly fell over when he saw the outstanding dollar amount. He’ll be playing for the love of the game this weekend and I know exactly how he feels after copping a $2,500 fine for making contact with an umpire earlier this season. Perhaps I should charge the media blokes for the brilliant work I do on kangaroos.com.au!

I gave Lachie some tickets to the new Nightmare on Elm Street movie to help take his mind off the phone bill. The other reason I gave them away is because I can’t stand scary movies. Seeing Freddie Krueger’s face on the passes was bad enough for me. The first Saw movie is the only scary movie I’ve seen from memory and I sat there like a little girl with my eyes shut the entire time. I’m more of a comedy fan and am partial to the odd romantic comedy now and then.

I’ll probably get some attention from the boys for openly admitting I’m easily frightened but I’m not worried. I’m more worried about being on the end of a North Melbourne ‘gotcha call’. Ben Cunnington, Leigh Adams, Todd Goldstein, Brayden Norris and Lindsay Thomas were bored the other day between footy clinics and decided to torment some other players with prank calls. Then Hamish McIntosh and Nathan Grima joined in on the act.

Jamie MacMillan was asked if he would return to his high school and host a trivia night, Nathan ‘Wacky’ O’Keefe agreed to go on TripleM with the chance to win money, Conor Meredith had a call from the Irish Times newspaper and Majak Daw was told that his car was being towed from out the front of his house. However Ayden Kennedy had a near panic attack when the ‘police’ accused him of palming off his demerit points to family members. He is still unaware that he had been ‘got’. If he reads this article he’ll probably sleep a lot better!

I almost thought I was being fooled the other day when Dad called me up asking for a ticket to this week’s game against Fremantle for his client Michael Firrito. Dad works at Bell Stratton and Murdoch accountants and was pretty excited. As it turns out he was telling the truth so hopefully I can get the two Michael Firrito’s together so they can catch up and talk about the old country - Eugene Arocca might be interested too!